Wycombe Report - Part 2

Grimsby Town 3 Wycombe Wanderers 1
25 Aug 2003, Nationwide League Division 2

Rodgers fair murdered the ball with a smacking, whacking thwack from about 20 yards out, in the centre. The ball zoomed through the pack of exiting defenders and Davison, magnificently, flew horizontally to his right and punched the ball away from the bottom corner of the goal.

There were one or two moments of concern in the Town defence, like the time Barnard was left with two players running at him, with Campbell sipping an iced tea at the Café Valerie. Barnard’s solution was crude, but effective - a knee in the thigh and a fist in the groin, leaving McSporran Mcsplattered on the ground. The referee didn’t book Barnard, which was nice. The other moment of Town madness was when Ford and Davison decided to play Total Football inside the Town penalty area, passing the ball lazily between them. Ford then turned past Onuora on the edge the box, and set up a one touch passing movement up the centre which tore Wycombe apart, only a slightly over-hit dink from Crowe ending that free flowing samba down the pitch.

The first half was a strange affair, long periods of hopeless hoofing and collisions, punctuated by fleeting moments of marvellous, mesmerising movement from Town. Wycombe could not cope with passing or pace, put them together and you have Cas and Crowe sweeping majestically down the right like wildebeest across the savannah. Cas, in particular, was irresistible at times, with his surging dribbles in from the touchline towards the middle of the park. His first attempt saw three Wycombites, flailing, falling, failing to stop the juggernaut as he zoomed in towards goal. About 20 yards out, Cas wafted his left boot at the ball which sailed comfortably to the ‘keeper at chest height. His second attempt, near the half hour, got Town a free kick as the third defender legged him up about 20 yards out, slightly to the right of centre. As the Town fans debated which player would chip the ball just over the bar, or hit the defenders in the groin, the goalkeeper wandered off to his right, leaving a huge space on the left hand side. BARNARD lifted one eyebrow, lifted his left foot, then lifted the ball over the wall and into the side of the netting, goalkeeper flapping like a rabid moth. Ooh I say, hello!

The pattern of the game didn’t change after the goal, with Town rarely clicking and Wycombe often quacking. How many times can a team kick the ball out of play before they are disqualified from driving? Currie showed some beautiful touches.. to his hair. Lovely highlights, complementing the Home Counties polo look favoured by Lawrie Sanchez - pale slacks and a light mauve shirt. From a distance he looked like a catalogue model, all he needed was a jumper trailing around his neck and a faraway gaze. Woa-woah-woah yeah, here he comes, here comes the Knight. Sir Desalot, finally controlling the ball out on the right, swishing past and brushing away a little red rooster of a defender. Shame about the shot, from 20 yards out, which bombled nicely straight to the ‘keeper. Penalty! No. Boulding, tricking his way slickly past a defender on the bye-line inside the penalty area was subjected to an unwanted, impromptu hokey cokey by the jigging defender. The referee played advantage to Wycombe, as the ball ran free, Boulding tackled and a free kick was awarded against the maddened Mariner. Cue wailing from the Pontoon, as it awoke from its post luncheon slumber.

"This coffee’s worse than the ammonia at Molineux".
"Wycombe are like an inept version of last year’s Town".
"Charlie Mapes? Sounds like a chirpy cockney wide boy with connections".
"Davison’s much better than before. With us, not Bradford".
"Where’s your Citroen gone?".