The Fishy "Special Achievements" Awards!

By: Bill Osborne
Date: 27/04/2003

IF you thought the Players Awards were over, think again! With Grimsby Town achieving relegation, The Fishy has decided to give 'Special Achievement Awards' to those players who have made a significant contribution to the campaign to secure lesser glory.

But now that relegation has been safely secured, our players may have difficulty in adjusting to the rigours of second division football. Therefore, in giving these awards, we have chosen items which they can use in preparation for next season to improve their game!

The Fishy Awards 2002 - 2003

(If any picture fails to appear, please right click on the pic and select 'Show picture')

Paul Groves	The Book of Positives
This book will be invaluable to you as it contains positive 'after match' statements such as; "I know they beat us 9-0 but we stopped them scoring 10!"
Graham Rodger	A Submarine
By special arrangement with the Royal Navy we have booked you a months course at the Royal Naval College at Dartmouth on "How to Handle Subs!"
Danny Coyne	The Cross
Wear this and you will see there is no reason to fear crosses!
George Santos	A Brick Wall
For you George, because you have been a solid wall of defence - singly and solely
Tony Gallimore	A New Invisible Man Cloak
Bought to replace the one you have worn out as someone actually spotted you on the pitch during the Walsall game!
Steve Livingstone	The Remarkable Zimmer!
To use during those idle 79 minutes during the game when you are doing nothing so take the weight off your feet so you can last 90 minutes. (optional extras: motor and wheels)
Stacey Coldicott	Laser Guided Direction Finder
Designed specifically for you to enable you to calculate which direction you should be kicking the ball in!
Steve Chettle	Stretcher With Built In Back Support
Your own personalised stretcher with a special back support. (Optional extras: Rubbing oils and plaster casts)
Stuart Campbell	A Compass
Can be used in conjunction with the Coldicott Direction Finder but will tell you which way is up and left from right.
Alan Pouton	A Deck Of Cards
Seems so wrong that referees give you so many without a reciprocal offering. By exchanging cards with refs you can forge new relationships!
Steve Boulding	A Stop Watch
This watch is to be used to enable you to decide when to start your run, (preferably while you still have the ball.) Can also be used to enable you to stop and look to see who is where before you pass the ball. (If you ever do that is)
John McDermott	Dr Zeus Energy Pills
Using a special formula called 'Age shall not weary them' these pills have been produced to fill you with energy as you tramp up and down the sidelines chasing after opposing attackers. (Guaranteed to make you catch up to them now and again!)
Darren Mansaram	A Pair of Right Feet!
To match the pair of left one's you have. Guaranteed not to tangle and will travel in the same direction as your body. A novelty item!
Terry Cooke	Single First Class Train Ticket
Presented on behalf of Paul Groves this ticket is valid for all destinations departing from Cleethorpes! (Contains a 'no way back' clause)

Photographic Award - Mrs D An auto focus thingmejig!

Never take pics at Awards Ceremony if the wine is flowing. It affects the lenses or something!

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