Cod Widow's Diary Week 5
By: Chez Osborne
Date: 22/10/2000
Long-suffering Chez Osborne, wife of Nick, tells the tale of the week she has had to endure as a Cod Widow. Times can be hard and Nick stretches her patience to the full on occasions as his priorities in life differ widely from her expectations of them!
Diary of a Cod Widow
Mon 16th Oct | Not too good a day today. Nicko has toothache, poor thing. (How come the world has to stop when a bloke feels poorly?) |
Tue 17th | WOW! Sadman has just had his 1st multiple orgasm. Well you would think so judging by his behaviour.(Take a deep breathe, now)Town have just beat QPR and that new bloke Nielsen is good he set Livvo up twice and scored one himself he is a god sign him now he is dead fast sign him up he did a somersault when he scored he really gets the crowd going as well he is our new god in fact the whole team where good tonight.(You can exhale now) See what I mean? He said all that without taking one breathe of air.He's like a big kid with a new train set. Haven't seen him this excited since me him and Richard Gere did the, errrr....maybe I shouldn't go down that road. |
Wed 18th | Nicko is back in sadman mode today. He's been out and bought a new microphone for the PC. Now he won't stop messing about with the bloody thing. Yes, it's new, yes he's in kiddie mode, and yes, I'm well pissed off with him. maybe not him, but his juvenile behaviour. |
Chez dies waiting for Nicko in the park. | |
Thu 19th | I'm off out tonight. Sadmans well stressed at work today. Won't be home till late he tells me. If I don't get out, you will be very sorry, is what I told him. You can manage it for footie I said. Strange how he gets home just before 7-00. |
Fri 20th | Nicko got told off today. Hahahahahahaha.
He gets up about 4 ish for work right? I don't think so, his boss phoned at 7-00 wanting to know why he was still in bed. He was running round the bedroom like a headless chicken (not a pretty sight I might add). The poor little lamb. Hehehe. To be fair, he was awake half the night with toothache (again).I know it hurts, probably the worst pain ever, but he won't go to the dentist. Why? Because he's frightened to death, that's why. It's his only fear.(I'm sure he wet himself last time he went) |
Sat 21st | Its matchday, we have all been warned about ''noise pollution'' around the PC.
Well sod him, I'm off shopping for some thing to wear tonight.(Cant wait to see his face when he gets the bill. hahaha) Sadmans not as touchy as usual, Town lost 2-0 and he's not too depressed. We did well to keep it down to 2 he says.(Like I care?) |
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